Bitter Love
by Angelling
Summary: Kyoko Already engaged with Ren, But suddenly her mother come back into her life and demand something that will change her life forever. can she choose between her mother wish over her life with ren?
1. Chapter 1

**Author Note**: This is my first fanfic and still learning to be better. if there are errors in the text please bear with me, because my mother language is not English (but I'm still happy to accept if shown where the fault) if there is a cruel criticism or praise will I receive with pleasure and please give a review or a suggestion if well pleased. thank you

Btw, "Lost Memoir" is the Korean drama with the original title is "Stairways to heaven" that i took the synopsis and change the players name into japanesse name.

Disclaimer : I do not own skip beat, even if i dying wanted to make REN mine ~~.~~

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><p><strong>8:30 PM at Fuji TV Studio.<strong>

"Arigatou gozaimasu ..." Kyouko said as she bowed to the crew of _"Lost Memoir"_, then go out from the studio and heading toward the lobby. It was the latest drama which she played a leading role, in which the story is almost like a Cinderella story in modern times, is about a girl and a boy were best friends since young and shared a special bond with each other. They Became Closer when the girl mom passed away and the boy lost his dad Also at a young age. The girl dad remarries and she is now caught with a new stepmother, stepbrother, and stepsister. and she plays as Yuiko Shimizu.

The stepsister, Yuri is envious of Yuiko and Takuya relationship and tries her best to win the boy affection but the boy has eyes only for Yuiko . Meanwhile, Yuiko is ill treated at home by her stepmom and stepsister. She finds solace in her stepbrother Kazumi, when Takuya is oblivious to her misery.

Soon, Kazumi develops feelings for the kind and caring Yuiko, but Yuiko strongly loves Takuya and vice versa. Yuiko and Takuya are separated when Takuya starts of his studies overseas first before Yuiko joins him. But tragedy befalls them when Yuiko gets involved in a car accident caused by Yuri and loses her memory. Yuiko's identity is erased by Kazumi because he wants her all to himself and he can't let her leave him.

Five years past, when Takuya returns to Japan to resume his family business and encounters Yuiko who has lost the memory of them together. Hence, the emotional roller coaster begins, as Takuya and Yuiko fights their destiny to be together. The story evolves into a romantic journey where they reunites, and the trials they have to face together.

She really likes this drama because the plot a lot of intrigue and romance is very touching. but another reason is because she was able to love again, so she wanted to hone her acting skills in the romance category. YES, she can love again, and it was all because of _him_. she smiled so sweetly to herself, making the people she passed look with awe because she looked so sweet and beautiful.

After almost two years know Tsuruga Ren, suddenly he declared his love, she accepted. because in the past half year, she was with the help of her best friend Moko came to realize that the man is not just a senpai that she respect and a co-actor. But he was also a man who she loved.

In the fifth months of their date, Ren told him of all his secret that he is Kuon, the son of his father Kuu Hizuri and the reason how he could be Tsuruga Ren. and that he also corn, how he met Kyouko in kyoto. and he apologized to her for hiding these things from her all this time. Initially she nearly fainted when she received all the information simultaneously.

But she forgave him, and encouraged him to confess to the world, and to his fans. Because that he has been successful and not under the shadow of his father again, and that he don't need to fear for his past mistakes. and she tell him that she'll accompany beside him when he will make a statement to the press, and will never leave his side through the press conference.

when the arrived time to confess at the press conference, his father Kuu Hizuri and mother Julie Hizuri came to give moral support. however, unbeknownst to Kyouko, Ren was also proposed to her in front of the media that broadcast alive. It makes a shock because she was afraid that she will not be accepted by the fans of Tsuruga Ren, that she was just a plain, and not attractive girl dating with most wanted bachelor number one in Japan. dating is different from marriage, when dating can be broke up someday, but married is mean to spend all your life with the you love till death. but Ren makes sure kyouko would said yes. so he is doing it in front of media and she can not run anywhere.

But when the press released the news about Ren's past and that he was engaged to kyouko. Welcome from the community is very under-estimated because society recognizes the courage of Ren to acknowledge its past, even the people approve of their relationship and create blogs about Ren and Kyouko to support whatever they do.

And here she is now waiting for the man that she love to fetch him home, Suddenly a hand embracing her slender waist, and made her surprise jump. she turned her head to the side to see who is doing it. and a smile that super shiny and bright it is addressed to her, making the mini demons in Kyouko mind melted and shout for help. She was nearly six months of dating with Ren, but she still did not used to the touch, sweet words, attention, and his kiss.

"Hi, good night dear. Did you finish your work here? Ready to go?" he ask with a smile and eyes filled with love to her.

"Yes, I finish already. Did u already have your dinner Ren?" She asking knowing that possibility he will skip dinner.

"Uhm..." he avert his eye to the other side. And she knew that he is not taken dinner yet.

"Great..., until when i must always babysit you to remember eat properly Ren?" she asking with a pouting face.

'O my...what a cute face and i want to kiss...' Ren thought. "Ren..ren..are you even listening?"

"Yes..i'm sorry..okay i think you should babysit me until i'm old" he chuckled. Suddenly he feel chill in the air, and when he look down to the girl he love. 'O..ow..it's not good to teasing her right now i think' when she slowly turning into mio mode. "Ehem..It's not like i want to skip the dinner, i just want to eat hambuger steak with egg on the top. But i dont want to eat alone, so i just waiting for you to finish the job. so...how about it? do you want to accompany me to the dinner?"

"Of course. what are we waiting for? let's go!" she said with enthusiasm. and she pulled his hand to the basement via elevator, where is his sport car park.

when they reached the house of a distinguished family meals provide a hamburger steak, they find a place to sit in the corner, and began orderer food. when their orders arrived, she began to talk about her day. and Ren listen carefully, while giving some comments. when she finished, she saw Ren was watching him with a loving smile.

"what are you looking at?" she asking innocently. " I looking at you. I love you, kyouko" he said. His statement made her blushed. she look down at her almost empty plate "Yeah, i know. I love you too" she blushed even more. and they finish their dinner in silent, then go to parking loot to sent her home.

"Kyouko, do you have time this saturday?" he said immediately, after they inside the car. "Uhm...i think i have a work related Box'R that morning because Box'R almost finish its programme this month, but after that in afternoon i have nothing to do for the rest of the day and i'll just stay at LME. Why do you asking, Ren?"

"Nothing particullar, i just want to take u to somewhere. Ok, then how about I pick you at 1 PM this saturday?"

"uhm..ok" as she said, they already arrived at her new apartment. she didnt live with daruma-ya couple anymore, because she is more regonized actress now, and she is betrothed to most handsome man in showbiz. So the media wouldnt leave her alone and always want to interview her. She became afraid that would make Daruma-ya couple uncomfortable, so she decided that she would move out and live alone beside she already made enough money to spoil herself.  
>and she release the seatbelt. before she out from the car, she turn to Ren side and she kiss him in the cheek. "Good Nght, Sweet Dream Ren and Thank you for taking me home" she said with a blush in her cheeks. "It's my pleasure my dear princess, same goes for you good night and sweet dream."<br>she got out from the car and heading to the front loby of her apartment, and before she go in she turn her back and she wave to him. he smile back and take off to his apartment.

With her busy schedule, saturday came in really fast. that morning she busy for her role as Natsu. this is her last time in Box'R set, because Box'R already at its last season and will end in the next week broadcast. She will realy miss Natsu, she thought. but she also excited to play another role, this afternoon she will meet sawara-san to take a few project that he tell it's for her. she really hope this time will not another mean role.  
>it's almost 1 PM, i must hurry meet sawara then go meet Ren. She really miss him, it's almost 1 week since last time he drove her back. and she can wait to meet him again today.<p>

"Good afternoon, Sawara-san" she said as she walked in the office where sawara desk is. as usual his desk full of paper almost hide his face.

"Ah...good afternoon, Mogami-san. There you are..i can't wait to give u the offer. there is 5 offer this time for you to take. you can choose whatever you really like" he said with a big smile. he already see all of her growth since the first time she roll in LME, and with all of her progress to this day, he's really happy for her. and he want what is the best for herself.

"Thank You, Sawara-san. I'll look all of it throughly, so don't worry i'll not let you down. BTW, when i must give you the answer sawara-san?"

"You can tell me the answer next week."

"Ok. i'll not distrub your work anymore sawara-san. Good afternoon and thank you" she said as she bowed deeply like usual and then go outside.  
>when suddenly her body vibrate from head to her toe..and she realized it's was her handphone that rang, and she pick her phone from her bag.<br>"Hello..Mogami's Speaking" then she heard a chuckle in the other side of the phone.

"Hi, like usual still not used to the phone, ne?" he said with a chuckle.

"Oh..Ren..dont tease me please. it's not like you see me here, so that you know i'm still not used" she said with a pouting face.

"But, I cleary see you right now. how about you turn to your behind"

She immediatly turn to the behind her, then she saw the man that she love and his manager. she close her cell phone, and walk to them.

"Good afternoon, Ren", "Good afternoon, Yashiro-san"

"Good afternoon, Kyoko-chan" yashiro-san reply, while ren immediatly kiss her in the lips. in fornt of his manager.

"Rennnn!" she shout, with a face as red as tomato. he only chuckle and his manager smile wide in his fan girl mode.

"you really have no shame, you pervert king, playboy,you.." he cut her speak "what wrong with kissing the girl that i love in lips, and also everybody already know that we already engaged"

"but...". "that's right kyoko-chan, you already engaged. so its natural for ren kiss u wherever, whenever he want." yashiro try to defend ren.

"Great...you two must be enjoy to tease me, huh.."

"btw kyouko, are u already have a lunch?, we just finish our job so still havent eat. how about eat lunch togheter" Yashiro-san said, know that Kyouko wouldn't reject this offer because of the man she love really really have a bad eat habit.

"Sure..okay..let's go" she said immediatly with a smile.

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><p><strong>so how it is guys? my first fanfic..<strong>

**i hope i'll do a better job next chapter..please review it..thx**


	2. Forever Yours

**A/N : One Again Skip Beat isn't mine, but i hope Ren Will be mine**

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><p>After th Lunch with Ren and Yashiro. We go to our separate ways, yashiro go to meet with some of director to talk about new offer. And Ren take me somewhere like he promise me.<br>he didn't want to tell me where we'll go, he said it's a surprise. the after 15 minutes in the car, we finally arrive.  
>He take my hand and take me to the nearest shop. and my eyes suddenly capture something flashy in the windows shop, 'o my good dont tell me..!' my thought screaming.<p>

Ren take notice in the change of her horified face. then he sighing, ' really, that is no other girl like this. usually they will be jumping or scream of happines, even they will beg for more, if men take the girl to this shop. but not her..she is really rare, that's way i love her' and he drag the petrified like statue girl beside him to move inside the shop.

when they inside the shop, they are immediately greeted by a female employee in the store.  
>"good afternoon, I am Tsuruga Ren, i already make an apoinment"<br>"Ah...good afternoon Tsuruga-san. i already waiting for u. please follow me"

they go inside the room in the back of the shop. "Please have a seat and Wait a moment for my manager will be here in the moment" with that said, she leave the two of them alone in the room.  
>"Ren, Why are u take me here?" she said almost screaming. he sigh "Kyoko, i already propose you, so isn't it natural for me to buy our engagement ring? beside i really dont have a time before because of what happend after the press conference. so i'll made it up for u this time"<br>"But..but..it didn't have to be this store! i already heard this store item price is can bought an entire disney land!"  
>he chuckled "Kyoko, you exaggerated. it's not that expensive, so don't worry about it"<br>"BUT.." "Kyoko!" he cut her suddenly, she can feel him anggry. "i dont want hear excuse anymore kyoko, just accept my prove of love okay? or you dont want to be with me? so you dont want me to buy the ring?" he made a puppy look.  
>'damm him, why he must made that face? he know i can resist that face.' she sigh "Fine, but only in the reasonable price" and with that said he smile and it made her blush.<p>

"i'm sorry for making you wait. my name is Yamada Hiro, just call me Hiro. i'm the manager of this shop. so i already informed by tsuruga-san that he want the best ring for his bride to be" and he looking to kyoko who is blushing as red as tomato.  
>"Ara..what a fine Young lady. isn't she tsuruga-san?" "indeed, she is" and he smirk to her, making her more blushing madly.<br>"so what did you bring for us, Hiro-san?" he ask.  
>"i already have a finest of a couples of Ring, You can take a look here" he open the box that he bring with him when he first come into the room.<br>"hmm..so kyoko what do you say? which one you like?"  
>"uhm.." i take a look to the some of the rings. it's really beautiful and my good whats with that diamond on top of each ring. it's so big, why he must order something like this.<br>"Ren..it's beautiful all of them but i dont like the diamond, its too big for me, can i have another that is more smaller that this?" i asking him.

"do you have another rings, hiro-san?" "of course, you can look into another box" and he take out another box.  
>i looking again to another box. and suddenly my eyes look at something that interesting. i move my hand to take the ring, the ring is simple yet unique because of the little fairy that the became the ring it self and she hold the diamond.<br>"Ara..do you like that miss? it's a tinkerbell and peterpan wedding band, so in your hand is the tinkerbell, while for the man is the peterpan with the same style but while tinkerbell is facing to the left, the peterpan facing the right."

She didnt really hear what that man said anymore, because she already in her lala land. but ren know her best, so he already know that she already fall in love with that Ring.  
>"Ok, Hiro-san. i'll take that Ring. and can u please engrave the word that i ask u hiro-san?"<br>"of course, tsuruga-san. immediatly"  
>"and dont worry about the price hiro-san, just give me the best carat of that ring"<br>with that said he nodded and immediatly go outside the room.

"Kyoko came on we go outside, i want to pay the bill and take you somewhere again tonight" but she still in her lala land to hear ren.  
>he sigh. 'oh..dear..she really never change did she? even after she became such a great actress' he look at her with amusement in his face and soft cuckled.<p>

after he pay the bill and take the ring that he bought. he take her somewhere again.  
>"where are we going now, ren?"<br>"it's still a surprise..but i will give u hint, i will take u to a dinner. after all it's already 6.30 PM now"

she just nodded and silent go between them in the car until they arrive. when she out from his car, she immediatly look around and found that she is in the top of the hill with the town light all over the hill.

she take a deep breath "it's beautifull ren, thank you so much for taking me here" she said with such a loving smile.  
>he just can take his eyes from her "yes, indeed it's really beautiful" but his eyes only look at her.<br>she blush and suddenly look at her shoes like its interesting. " you mean the scenery or me?" she said almost whispering. but ren hear her.  
>"who do you i said? of course it's you. after all this time, my eyes only sees you kyoko. never anyone else" and he suddenly kneel in front of her and take her hand in his.<br>"i know, i never do a proper way to propose you before because i'm too scared of your rejection. but now i will. so mogami kyoko, do you want to marry me? the one that need you the most in this world? i cant promise you anything right now, because i cant prove it to you right now. but what i can make sure and promise for you is i, my heart and soul will be only yours forever"

"So...Kyoko..Please be my side forever"  
>"yes..ren..yes...i'll and i want to be by your side" she said with a sob and tears in her eyes. and she pull and hugging ren.<br>he pulled out the box from the jewerly shop before and he slipped the tinkerbell ring into her slender fingger. while he put the peterpan ring into his fingger himself.

"i love you kyoko" he whisper in her ears. "me..too.." she said with a blush. and he kiss her in the lips with passionate and love.  
>"i think we better go to eat, before i lost control myself" he said with a chuckled.<br>"okay.." she still as red as tomato but follow me with her hand in mine.

we eat with happines full in our heart, we eat while looking at the scenery. he already prepare all of this just for me. he always tried to make joke to relax me, even he fails miseberally. but it make him more funny. that is no doubt in my heart that this is the man that i will love for the rest of my life and i only want to spent all my life to be beside him. that is my only wish right now. i even dont want this moment to dissaper.

after we eat it's already 9 PM. "come on it's already late, i'll take you home" he said and take my hand, he open the door to his car. i slipped into his car and he cloosed the door. he go to his driver seat. and we took off, we didn't said anything on the trip to my home. but never let go of my hand. i dont need any more word from him, just like this moment is enough for me.  
>and finnaly we arrive at my home. he open my seatbelt. and he kiss me again in my lips " good night, kyoko. have a sweet dream. i'm really happy today"<p>

"me..too, ren. i'm happy too. thank you for all that u have done. good night and sweet dream" and i kiss his cheek. i open the door car. and go inside the apartement. i know he will not go until i go inside.

when i inside of my apartement. i sit on my chouch and lay back. the tired of today activities already got into me. but i still smiled while looking at the ring at my finger. i cant belived, i already became ren fiancee, the man most desireable in japan. suddenly i remember something that he said while in the shop to hiro-san, to make something engraved.  
>i took off my ring, and i examined the ring. i gasped that is a word engraved in the ring <em>"Forever Yours"<em>. "Ren.." i said with a soft smile, but suddenly i hear a bell ring through my apartement. i slipped the ring to my fingger. 'who is that? in such hour? i look at the time its already 10.30 pm maybe the security?'

"hai..hai..." i said when i hear the bell rang again.  
>i open the door. "who..." but my voice suddenly can't get out again and i petrified, i look in horror for the person in front of me. 'why...' my mind screamming at me.<p>

"Hello Kyoko...dont you want to invite me go inside?" the person said.

"Mother..." she wishperd...

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><p>some of you must be thinking this chapter such a boring story...but bear with me okay..please review..thx<p> 


	3. Mother

**A/N : thank you for the one that revieuw and read my stories..acctually i preaty shy to post this story. i'm afraid of my lacking skill...but i'll try my best.. yosh..! here we goo...**

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><p>"Mother..." i whispered...<p>

xxxxxxxxx

while i'm in the kitchen prepare for the tea, i kept thinking how can my mother here right now in such an hour. and the most important thing, how she know i lived here?. i'm affraid of the reason what make my mother come. did she angry with me? because i became an actress? even i have no longger live with her since small but i still afraid of her.

i got out of the kitchen, and bring the tray of tea that i made. i place it in front of my mother and i took a sit in front of her, sip my tea and look at my lap like it was a rare lap . a minutes pass but no one dare to speak first. then suddenly my mother speak "Kyoko..i can see how u enjoy your life now"

"Y..yes..mother.." i answer still not looking her

"Kyoko..i want to meet you..all this time...i...i miss you dear"

i look at her suddenly in shook, i see her eyes filled with love and were soft. not like the usually she treat me when she reject me. "wh..what..are you say oka-san?" i said with a trembeling voice.

"i said i miss you and i want to meet you..kyoko-chan" one again she said it. i can believed my ear, how can my mother said that word? the word that i always longging all this time in my life.

"b..but..why..oka-san? after all this time? why..now?" i said with tears on the edge and i look back at my lap with my hand on the cup. i heard my mother sighing. "kyoko.." i flinch heard my mother voice afraid that she will hit me like she used to be because i just answered her right now.

"Kyoko..please..look at me..don't afraid of me anymore..i... i..beg for your forgiveness kyoko..." and she cry suddenly.

i look back at her, with a shook and confuse in my face. it's really my mother right in front of me? the mother that usually treat me like a crap/garbage. but the woman that cry right in front of me is now like a hopeless women. i can see her different now, she is now more like a woman maybe the age made it seem like that, with her hair more graying now not the black like i used to know.

"oka-san..please dont cry...what happens to you...it's not like the usual you..?" i said but i didnt move from my spot even i really want to hug her and comfort her, i'm too scared of her rejection again.

"kyoko..i think i must give you an explaination after all this time.." with that said she straitghn up again. "Kyoko i'll tell you a story about why i hate you before. and about myself"

"before you born i came from a wealthy family of miyagi. i'm the only daughter of miyabe. so when i'm 19 years old. my parents makes me meet they right hand that them thrust. when i meet him, he said he like me, but of course i dont believe it, because all of the boys that like me usually like the money that i had, but with the times goes by...i..eventually fall in love with him. and i know he is really sincere and really love me from the depth of his heart. not because of my wealth. but...his brother...his...blood brother..." and she broke into a cry again but with no sound only with tears trailing down her cheecks and the hate that shown in her eyes.

"okaa-san..are you okay?"

"oh..i'm sory..kyoko-chan, let me finish the story.."  
>"his brother...envy of him..then..then..he raped me...right in the night of my engagement with him"<p>

My eyes widened in a shock, and i feel my stomach hurt 'no..don't tell..me...' "but..kyoko..you rest assured. you are not the daughter that the men raped me. because i already pregnant when he raped me. but satoshi..he know that his brother raped me. when he confront him in his apartment. he ...he...killed...by his own brother..."

i feel really sick right now. i think i gonna puke in the cup that i grabbed si hard in my hand, that my knuckels became white. and can i feel my cheecks wet.

"After he killed satoshi..he...he..tell my parents that satoshi involved in drugs with some mafia, and killed himself because he shame on himself. of course my parents believed him because he is the left hand of my parents. then he make me to married him, through my parents. of course i cant object because i pregnant. but the most horrible things he done is, he killed my parents through the poison. and with that he take over the miyagi company. and..i can't take it anymore, so that night when he make a party to announce that he is the CEO of the company, i ran away from him.. and i change my name into the mogami saena." then she paused for a moment.

"but the hard time when i'm alone, the hard time i alone giving birth to you.. it's make me became a terrible person. i blame all that happen to me to you..kyouko..the only child of me and satoshi, the man that i ever love. i hate you because yours eyes made me remember of him, remember that he leave alone in this world, hate you because you have the half blood of the person that raped me and killed my parents. hate you..because i shame on myself for running."  
>"Oh..my..Godd..Kyouko..pleaseee...mad at me, say something, shout at me, but please..forgive me... after all this time what i..i..have done to you.." she broke into a hard sob.<p>

i find myself moving from my spot, and sit beside my mother. "oh..oka-san..please..dont cry. i cant blame you for what all have you been through. how can i mad at you...oka-san" i silenty cry. and i hugging my mother, i can feel my mother body tensed up a bit.

"Kyouko..you always such a good daughter. i'm really sorry for what have i done to you all this time. the truth is i always miss you and i always feels horrible after i hit you or ignore you, but can't change back." "its okay oka-san"

"but kyouko i need to continues my story. it's the real reason why came to you today"  
>"after you at 7 years old, i leave you in fuwas. and i borrows the money from them. then i leave you because i need made my revenge after the years of pain in my heart, i need revenge. then i made a small company from the money, after all this years my company made it and became world known even in international. i already made my way up near to the man that made my life turn upside down. but..but...the god is cruel kyouko..it turn out i dont have time anymore"<p>

"what did you mean oka-san?" i asking with a confuse face.  
>"i..i'm sick kyouko...i only have 6 months or maybe less than that to life" she said with the face down in her lap.<p>

"WHAT! what are you saying oka-san...it's impossible right? you will tell me it's a joke right?" i asking with a trembeling voice.

my mother shake her head. "it's the truth kyouko. i have a cancer, the docter already give it up on me"  
>"So kyouko..." my mother look into my eyes. "i..i..want you to come with me..i want you to continue my company...but for the revenge i already give it up..i dont want you to follow my step into the pit of hell too. but if you want to came with me, you must leave all of your showbiz activities even you must leave your id behind. because its too dangerous. that man still hunt me down after all this years. and i dont want to lose you too"<br>"the company that i start is sakura company"

"What? you mean sakura company its that sakura company that the jewerly and the fashion is no.1 the world ?" i shout out of shock. because the ring that in my finger also from that company if i dont mistake it.

"yes that sakura company. i'm the CEO of that company. and my name isnt mogami saena anymore. but sakura mai. but kyouko..i will not force you to take this responsibilty. i just want to spend my remaining time with you. i really regret this all this time. i never be a good mother for you, i never do a single right thing for you. but if you choose to be with me, i must asking you to leave showbiz and.."  
>"and what mother?" i ask<br>"and your fiancee Tsuruga ren/Kuon Hizuri" my mother said with a stren voice

"But why oka-san? cant i be with you just like this? i can leave the showbiz for you but how can i leave him. he the one that i love oka-san? if i leave him..he...will break" i said with a sad voice

my mother shake her head "it cant be helped kyouko, it's too dangerous for you and the person by your side. because that man already made a move into my company, he want to take control my company too. but i wont give it up. that man already involved in mafia in japan. i dont want to take a risk to reveal my id an yours too"

"oka-san..i..." my mom suddenly put her fingger on my lips. "kyouko just thinking about it, i'll never force you to do anything that you dont like anymore. but i want you to know all this time i always love you and please forgive me for my sudden appearence"

"Oh..oka-san...i already forgive you since a long time ago...because you are my oka-san" i said with a soft smile.

"okay than i think i must go..it's already 1 AM in the morning. you must be tired" she stand up.  
>but i hold her "Oka-san please stay here tonight, i want to sleep with you tonight cant i?" i asking with a blush and look down at my feet, after this is the fist time my mom said she love me.<p>

i feel my mother finger in my chin and she held my face up to face her. "if you dont mind i spent a night here than its okay"  
>that night i can not describe my feeling. all of the mix into one, happines because of ren, happyness because my mother is back to me, but sad and angry, hate toward the man that made my mother and my live miserrable.<br>i dont know what time i fall asleep, but i know for sure, that night its the first time i sleep with my mother beside me hugging me and stroke my hair until i fall a sleep.

when i woke up in the morning, i found my mother already gone. she leave a note_ "remember kyouko, the choice is all yours, i only want you happy. i give you one week to think about it, if you already made up your mine. than you can call me in this number below to inform me about your choice. loves oka-san. xxxxx-xxx-xxx"  
><em>i held the note, and my tears flowing from my cheeks _"how can i be happy oka-san? if you dont even happy after all this years that man made your life like hell"_ i whispered_._

_xxxxxxxxxxxx_

After that day, i continue my activities like usual. but i can get the problem out of my head.  
>suddenly i feel someone hit my back "ohayo kyoko-chan"<br>"ah..ohayo..moko-chan"

"what wrong with you, its something wrong? you're like a dead man walking, i know that look the look that u usually wear when you want to hide something! so what happen? is tsuruga san hurt you? i'll kill that man!" she said with angry voice ready to kill.  
>"no..no...moko-chan its not tsuruga-san, okay..i dont have a problem..like that. my problem is just i dont know which one of this offer i must choose." i lied.<p>

"hmm..let me see.." with that said she brows through the offer that sawara-san give me 3 days ago. "hmm..all of them is good. i think its should be up to you after all"  
>"okay hehehe..i'll think about it again.." i said with more cheerfull voice so moko will not suspicious.<p>

"btw, moko-chan..i want to ask something"  
>"what?"<br>"moko-chan..if i ever made you angry/mistake can you forgive me?" i ask shyly  
>"moo..what kind of Question is that? what did you do to make me angry btw?"<br>"no..nothing! just asking!"  
>"btw, if you made a mistake made me angry i think you have your own reason, so i will not really angry until i hear your reason"  
>"moko-chan...hmmph..arigatou moko-chan, arigatou for all you have done for me all this time moko-chan and arigatou for became my best friend" i said and hugging her thight.<br>"wha...what..are youu doing..get me off..youu sick girl..dont hugging me...and what are you saying..it's just like you will dissaper" she said with a red face because off the embarrassed .  
>"hehehe...nothing like that, i just want to said it. thats all" i said cheerfully.<p>

"okay than i must go the next apoinment" moko-chan said "see you again kyouko-chan"  
>"see you again moko-chan and take care"<br>and i look into the hall that she dissapear.  
><em>"if only you know moko-chan"<em> i whispered

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

the one week time almost over, it's 2 more days before i made up my mine.  
>today i'll meet with ren. he asking for a dinner with me.<p>

"good evening love. how is your days?" he asking me and land a kiss on top off my head.  
>"never been good" i said with tired voice.<br>"its something wrong? you looks tired"  
>"no..nothing..maybe because of my schedule."<br>"if you became very busy i think you must take a manager, so you will not tired yourself" he said with worried face.

i laugh "its okay ren. i will made it dont worry"  
>"but if you can handle it anymore, you must take a manager! do you understand? promise me!" he said with a stren voice.<br>"hai..hai...Bos i promise"  
>he sighing "alright then let go, i found a good place for a dinner"<p>

and we took off to the sashimi place that ren found. we eat while chat about our job and our schedule.  
>"btw kyoko when you want to choose our wedding date?" he ask with a emperor of the night face.<br>i froze in my place with my chopstick in the air. i can feel my face become pale.  
>"whats wrong kyouko? its there something you want to tell me?" he ask with concern.<br>"no..nothing..i..i..can choose the date yet ren. i'm not ready yet."  
>"why...?" he ask, i can see his dissapoinment face.<br>"i..i..still have so much thing i want to do...thats why.." i answered him  
>"but you still can do the things you like even if you already married with me, i'll not force you to quit your job or anything like that"<br>"please ren..i dont want to talk about this tonight..okay.."  
>"Okay!" he didnt push anymore, but he can feel something is wrong.<p>

i can feel him angry right now. oh god what must i do, what if he found out about my mother, what if he mad. calm..cal..kyouko take a breath..he cant know, he must not know about it.  
>the rest of the eating time is in silent. no one dare to ask the other. Ren afraid that if he push kyouko more, she will run away from him and maybe called off the engagement, while kyouko to afraid about her problem got out from her big mouth.<p>

then with that he take her home to her apartment. and when he want to make a conversation, suddenly he feel her fingger held his arm. he look at her and give a geniune smile only for her, and he can see in the corner of his eyes that she blush like a tomato. 'great my smile still have an affect for her, what will i do if she hate me because i just want we wed sooner' he thought.  
>"ren.."<br>"hmm.?"  
>"i'm sorry for earlier in the restaurant..."<br>"its okay, its my fault too for pushing you too much"  
>with that said he park into the parking loot of her apartement.<br>"ren..please forgive me..if i ever made you sad"  
>he confuse why is she ask for forgiveness. "what are you saying dear, you done nothing wrong.."<br>she shake her head hard "no...i must ren..i must ask for your forgivenes.., but ren you must know i never meant it to hurt you"

he became more confuse with her speech.."okay...but i dont really understand what you say dear"  
>"soon..soon..you will know ren.." she said with a sad voice.<br>"what are you saying..?" he panic now  
>"not now ren..i'm tired"<br>he want an answer from her, he has this uneasy feeling in his heart dont know what it means, but he to afraid to push her for an answer.  
>"okay..kyouko. how about tommorow i will take you to somewhere fun?" hope that she will cheerful again<br>"okay, ren...oh btw ren..you have my apartement key right? tommorow you just come into my apartment okay.

"okay, ill pick you up at 10 am. how about it?"  
>"sounds good" she replied<br>"then good night ren" she kiss him in the cheeck.

"good night, kyouko. i love you" he said. but she didnt reply, usually she reply with 'me too' or 'i love you too' but today she didnt reply.  
>but she only look at him with sad eyes.<br>'whats wrong with her? did i do something wrong?'

but before he can say anything, she already out his car.  
>he sees her go inside the apartement, tommorow..i'll ask her whats wrong. <em>'tommorow...for sure'<em> he thought

when she already inside her apartement, she even didnt light the room. she sat at the couch and lay back. she took her phone out from the bag. she dialled the number that she already remember for a few past of the day. she heard the tone, in two times tone, the phone is picked up by the other side.  
>"oka-san..its me...i already made up my chooise, and can you pick me up right now?"<br>"uh hu..okay..arigatou oka-san"  
>and she closed her cell phone..the tears are flowing freely from her eyes to her cheecks.<br>"gomen..gomen...minna-san..gomen me ren..."  
>and she silently crying in her dark apartment.<p>

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><p>A?N : piuwww such a long chapter..thank god i didnt pass on my laptop.<p>

3 chapters in one day hope to your liking guys. please reviuw thx


	4. One and a Half Year Later

**A/N: this chapter is dedicated to:**

** 21han: thank you for your support from the first chapter for me^^ thank you 21han.**

**mangaaddict300: i dont know how to use beta reader..T_T please dont hit me..i know my speeling is horrible..i'll try my best to improve. thank you for the suggestion. btw i use a google trans for this chapter for help. please still reviuw even if it bad. hehe..**

**devilfromsnow : yes, i make sure mogami saena became a different person in this story, coz i find it not fair to judge what have she done to hate kyouko. i think every person always have some reason for what ever they do. so this time i make a story from her perspective. and thank you for point out my mistake too.. hehe i know i really bad in spelling and grammar. i mean it's really hard to text english while my language is very different. but really thank you for the support**

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><p><strong>one <strong>**and a half ****years ****later**

**TBM****Studio****  
><strong>  
><em>Kringgg Kringgg<em> ... .. "Moshi Moshi .. .." a man with a rubber glove pick up his cell phone.  
>"ah ... afternoon Yashiro-san .. where are you now?"<br>"in the TBM Studio takarada-san, how can I help you takarada-san?"  
>"what about the situation?"<br>"still as usual, working non-stop and without a break. even after doctors said he must rest after he passed out last week. he did not want to hear my words" he said, he could hear the sigh at the end of the telephon.  
>"ok, still watch him, do not remove him from your eyes a bit."<br>"Do not worry takarada-san, I'll keep my eyes on him"  
>"Good. if there is anything let me know soon"<br>"ok, takarada-san. good afternoon" and he closed his cell phone.

he leaned against the wall and looked toward the door, which his charge been to attend the kimagure-show. _'haahh ... it's been one and a half years have been passed ... where are you right now kyouko ..? how can you leave him? after you go, for first half year, he became broke down. he can not do anything right, so he had to quit from all activities in the world of showbiz to take a rest. and after he had to work back a year ago, he's just like a robot and just worked nonstop to forget you. Kyouko….'_ he thought with sad eyes towards the door.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

mean while in the room. in the love seat a handsome man who was looking at something in his hand. _"Kyouko .."_ he whispered.

**Flashback**

that day, the day when he came into the room of her apartment, in a dark room apartment with no lights turned on. "Kyouko ... I'm here... where are you? why Your apartment so dark? Kyouko ...?"

he lit the lamp in the living room. and headed towards her room, "Kyouko .. are you still asleep?" but when he up to in her room, her bed was neat unlike never slept last night. "kyouko .. if you're in the bathroom please shout?" he shouted, suddenly he felt uneasy. afraid something happened to her. and when he arrived in her bathroom, she does not exist in it as well. he panicked, 'Where are you kyouko? why you are not in your apartment? isn't last night they had promised to meet inside the apartment? or she's tired of waiting in her apartment then waited in the lobby? but I should've see her when she was in lobby, no way I would missed her ' he thought.

and when he would wear his shoes again. at the corner of his eye he saw something shining. he went straight to the table and that's when he saw it ... a ring, the ring that he bought almost a week ago. and a piece of paper and his apartement key. his heart pounding hard. with a trembling hand he took the paper and opened for reading.

_Dear Ren_

_I apologize, to tell you this way. This week I had a lot of thought after you bought an engagement ring for me. I guess I was afraid to go further in this relationship with you. and I thought I was not really fall in love with you, I might like you but only as a friend and I thought it would be cool if I could date a most wanted man no.1 in japan. I can not say it directly to you, for fear you'll be angry. so from now on you better forget about me, and look for another love that more suited to you. anyway I also do not want to marry you because I think I'm too good for you and i'm already bored with you. and I think I'm too tired to continue working in this showbiz world. so please tell Takarada-san I'm sorry for leaving like this, but if i tell it right in front of you or them, i'm affraid that they or you wouldn't let me go. I'm Sorry if i hurt you, so ren just forget about me and please take care of yourself from now on. _

_Mogami Kyouko_

**End of FlashBack**

he tightly grasp the ring that she left on that day  
>since then, he felt his world fall shattered to pieces. he can not do anything right. even his work didn't help either. when he should be shooting for a drama, he got a NG many times. he can not eat properly, because when he will eat he will remember her face that always pouting because he never ate properly. he could not even sleep properly, because when he slept he would always dream about her.<em><br>'why...why..kyouko..why..you must leave me? is it true that you don't love me even a little bit? why you must be so cruel to me? i can't even forget you after all what have you done to me...'_

suddenly he heard someone knocking on his door. he immediately rushed to enter the ring into his pocket.  
>"Ren ... the time has come .. let's go out to get ready" Yashiro said while Leaning in the door.<br>"Ok." he replied.  
>"Ren .. .. are sure you can do this show? this show is sure to be asked about your relationship with kyouko"<br>"yes, I could, after all it has been in the past Yashiro-san" he replied with a smile of his gentlemen.  
>"come on let's not make them wait" he rushed towards exit from the room. he could hear the manager sighed behind him.<br>'nothing else that I can do Yashiro-san, I have been looking for her everywhere, but I still can not find her. what has happened in the past, I can not change it again. even if I begged her to come back to me, she definitely will not want to' he thought bitterly. with that he gone to the show to face his destiny.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**mean while in the other part of tokyo.**

in a skyscraper where a very large office is located. a woman looking out her large window that's so big from the other wall that end to the other side of the wall. she has a soft light brown hair with bangs is styled to the side of her ear. and laid out a bun on top of her head. with deep blue-colored eyes thats like the deepth of ocean, she's wearing a professional outfit as worn by like usually office lady in japan. which seems not so suitable to his age who was so young, but she still looks gorgeous to look like that.

"Ai-sama" someone called.  
>"huh .. since when are you there Ryuji ..?" she asked him.<br>"has been since 5 minutes ago, I had knocked on the door and calling your name. but you do not answer" a young man named Ryuji answer.  
>"Ehh .. .. Gomen Gomen ..."<br>"Ai-sama ... how many times must I tell you, do not easily ask for forgiveness. you are the CEO of this company .you should not simply ask for forgiveness , "he sighed .  
>"uh ... but ..."<br>"Ai-Sama!"  
>"uh .. okay okay I understand. but I also told you how many times you just call me Ai huh ...!" she pouted.<br>"Ai .. here is the office so .." before he could finish the sentence, ai has cut his sentence by placing a finger on his lips.  
>"Just Ai... please ...?" Asking she with a puppy dog face.<br>she touched her fingers and squeezed it with his left hand. "okay ai" he sighed, and she giggled.  
>he touched her cheek with his right hand and she leaned on his hand with her other hand on top and closed her eyes.<br>"Ryuji .. it's been one and a half year since We meet nee .." she said.  
>"Yes, it's Ai"<br>"Arigatou ne .. Ryuji .. for always by my side all this time"  
>"It's me that should thanks to you ai, if it were not for you maybe I and my sister will be not like now, all because of you that have taken me off the streets"<br>"don't said it like that" she chuckled. suddennly she jump from her spot.  
>"Btw, speaking of your sister, where is she right now?<br>"whether she had completed the task that I requested? I already miss her" she Asking with Cheerful Voice.  
>"I'm right here from the start while you and my brother busy making out!" suddenly a voice coming from behind Ryuji.<br>"Yuu...!" she and ryuji shout. while their face as red as tomato.  
>"ok..i'm sorry.." she giggled. " please dont cut my payment Ai-sama" she chuckled and bowed to Ai.<br>"hummph..." she pout  
>"btw, i bring something to cheer you..it's a good news btw. you will like it Ai-sama"<br>"just call me Ai and i will forgive you." she threaten her.  
>"geezz..Ai-sama, alright Ai" she said with a soft smile to her.<br>"so..what did you get?" ai asking her.  
>"it's the important information for Project M, Ai"<br>"Okay...good..so let's the game begin nee..Ryujii Yuu.." she asking while looking out the window again.  
>"Hai..Ai-sama" they answered her with a serious tone.<p>

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><p><strong>AN: hope all of you that read my fic enjoy it.**

**please reviuw..^^ hope i can post another chapter soon. love u all**


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